Monday, August 24, 2009

the BEST run ever.

I haven't been able to finish my work out due in large part to my sides feeling like they are splitting in 4 pieces. And no, I'm not THAT out of shape. I'm hysterically laughing! And no, not at my jokes...

Here's the quick version:
I'm house-sitting, dog-sitting, and sitting-sitting (on a bed) for some semi-adult friends of mine while they cruise, not the Caribbean, not the Grecian Islands, not the Red Sea, but while they sail the Alaskan seaboard. Jealous? Me too. Well, I'm onto day 4 now and their 2 little nugget of dogs are super easy to care for. That is, now that I've developed the perfect cheese-to-sinus-pill ratio and don't have to force the dogs to do what I can't do in real life.I hate leaving them locked up all day and then leaving for the gym, so I've been running around their wayyy safer than my neighborhood, neighborhood and using their in-house gym. Fancy huh. (They've also got a pinball machine and jukebox upstairs in case anyone was wondering.) Tonight I thought I'd take them out for a little run too except I forgot my tennis shoes at my house. I hope Karrie doesn't kill me for this but I accidentally saw these 2 shoes that resembled running shoes but had an inverted arch reminding me of the infomercial about these shoes that give you better posture and more toned legs. My dad'll be happy about the posture thing and who wouldn't want more toned legs. So I looked around and decided it would hurt to take them out for a spin...or half-moon roll.

Here's where it gets great. The only leash I could find was this double action rope that makes the dogs practically walk on top of each other and ultimately yank the slower one along (or away from trying to go potty.) We made it just in front of the next door neighbor's lawn when I realized I was laughing audibly at how silly we must look: I'm jogging/rolling my way down the sidewalk being dragged by this 2 headed leash because I can't figure out how to run without feeling like I'm wearing moon shoes. Bailey, the slower pup, keeps wanted to go the bathroom but Haylie is bee lining it to the street corner and I can't pull back on both of them in time to let Bailey go potty before Haylie yanks Bailey out of her umm stance, drags her on two legs for a few feet...all the while I'm rolling my ankle with ever step.

This goes one for literally 15 minutes. The laughing out-loud, really loud. The yanking of Bailey. The bee lining of Haylie. And the constant ankle rolling by Karrie's bounce shoes.

THEN this bike riding 10 yr old wants to pet the dogs so I finally wrestle them to her, lean down to calm them down and let them (me) catch their breath....But of course we have stopped next to a fence with a huge German Sheperd who lunges at the fence, causes our bike friend to scream in my face, causing me to roll on Karrie's bouncy shoes into a backward tuck, causing the leash to pull the dogs together in one motion on top of me, and causing Bailey and Haylie to freak out and bark and lunge at the German Shepard...while still on top of me and Karrie's bouncy shoes.

Now that we're back home, Karrie's bouncy shoes safely put away, leash hung hidden from my tear-full eyesight, dogs heaving on the cool wood floors, and the bike rider undoubtably tramatized...I can't decide whether to lift those weights over there....

peace. love. and remembering my tennis shoes tomorrow.

1 comment:

Alison Portis said...

IVY... I was ok until I saw your photo of the shoes. HAHA!!! That cracks me up! I think I would have just called it a day if I didn't have my shoes. But then it's you we're talking about. I LOVE it! Those kinds of shoes have always cracked me up, and now when I see them, I'm going to (in my mind) see you jogging down the street...scratch that. I picture you bounding down the street. You made my night...oh, I needed that.