Sunday, February 3, 2008

Mr. Nike was sooo right.

Alright, lets just put these rumors to rest right off the back. Tomorrow I am attending an open call for MTV’s reality show: Legally Blonde, the search for a replacement in Nashville, Tennessee. Call me foolish, call me brave, call me crazy but here I sit in a Motel 6 trying to memorize 32 bars of new songs. At 10 o’clock tomorrow morning I will make a jackass of myself. Well, at least that’s my opinion. For those of you who don’t understand why I’m doing this: It’s something I cannot explain but the thrill of it is one that I hope everyone can experience at some point in their life. For those of you who don’t believe in me: Hi. My name is Ivy Koehler and I do care about what other people think, say, and feel about me. Yes, that means I care that you think I’m insane. That you think I am not talented enough to make a 10 hour drive for something that is unobtainable. And I would agree with you! But life is not about being on a reality show or being on a Broadway stage, at least not to me. Life is about opportunity for growth…in my case…as a human, a sister, a daughter, and a Christian. For those of you who think I should be here: thanks for the support but lets not kid ourselves. We can want something so bad out of life, it just might not be in the cards. Pardon the cliché, but does that stop us from playing? Not for me anymore.

I quit..err retired from collegiate golf last May and broke my sister’s heart. She was so proud of me and I felt like I was letting her down. I signed on with Coach Belt and the Lady Knights in high school to complete 4 years with a team, and I failed. 12 days after walking off the golf course in San Diego, California at the NAIA National Golf Championship and into the Westin Hotel in Times Square of New York City. Why? To sing a song I’d never sang with a piano for a panel of Telsey Casting directors. I wore a black knee-length dress with red Jessica Simpson heels as a reminder of Dorothy and her trip to Oz. I stood in line for 30 minutes before we were ushered into different groups to register and receive our audition number. I walked out. At the time, I talked myself into thinking I had no business being in New York, let alone one floor dividing some of the most celebrated casting directors and me. In hindsight, I still know I didn’t have any business being in that line. But where do I have business being? What is life without taking yourself outside of that comfort zone and putting yourself in unfamiliar territory? That’s why I’m here. I know I’m not going to make it. I am so not right for this deal. But just because I have no business being here…is the exact reason why I am here.

So regardless what your opinion is, if you even have one, let me tell ya this…life is too short to not just get in a car and go. Money will come and go just as friends will apparently, so live for yourself, prepare for tomorrow, and above all listen to your heart especially if no one else will.


Anonymous said...

oh my god oh my god you guys!!! Go sing your little blonde heart out! Don't kid yourself Ivy... whether or not you make it is not the point... you do belong there and you have just as good a chance as any! Break a leg!

Katie... AKA the best resident EVER!

Anonymous said...

if there is anything to ever listen to, it's your heart.

no one else. who cares what the rest of the world thinks. you do what is best for you and in turn it will make you a better person.

i think it took more guts than i have ever known to do what you did yesterday. for that, i am proud of you, no matter what anyone else says.

what you did, you did for you. for you to grow, to learn and to become who you are destined to be. so if there is anything you learned from yesterday, it is that you will ALWAYS have someone to support you, no matter what.


Melody said...

I think that this was very well written. I just wanted to say that. And that I liked your ending. It makes me think of church when everyone simultaneously yells out, "Amen!" ~Melody~